Now that my family is about to enter our 4th year of homeschooling, I felt it necessary to write a post to give as best a picture as I can about the pros and cons of choosing this educational path for your children. I know there are many parents out there on the fence, because they don't know "what they're getting into." Although I don't have ALL the answers (such as what it would be like to pull a middle-school aged child out of traditional school and transition them to homeschool), I can provide you with the highs and lows that we have experienced in our journey.
But, first and foremost:
2 Disclaimers
1) Distance Learning/Crisis Schooling that ran from March-June this past year was NOT true homeschooling.
Yes, you did most likely provide most of the educational support for your child, but you had to follow the lesson plans, expectations, and timelines of the classroom teacher. From what I understand, there was a considerable amount of stress in these situations as everyone dealt with juggling work, school, and the uncertainties of the virus. As we'll soon discuss, homeschooling is a situation in which you are completely independent from traditional schools.
2) If you DO choose to formally homeschool and your child is already enrolled in a public school, you will have to OFFICIALLY withdraw them (via letter) from the school and check your state's expectations for homeschooling.
Some states (like Texas) have very few regulations for homeschoolers, and others have stricter rules regarding record-keeping, subjects, etc.
With those two important items out of the way, we'll start with:
The Bad and The Ugly
Time and Effort are a Constant
Yes, yes, and yes. When it comes to adding homeschooling to your own personal to-do list, especially as you're starting out, it does take quite a bit of time and effort. You will have to pick your curriculum (books, workbooks, read alouds, etc.) you want to use and your approach (if you want to be more structured like a classroom or if you want to do unschooling).
Once you have everything picked, you'll have to plan your days and what you'll want to teach. Then of course, there's the teaching part and the adjusting to the needs of your kids.
For the time and effort you put forth, you realistically need to look at it as at least a part-time if not a full-time job, especially initially.
Frustrations and Doubt
Around those times you're making adjustments, getting used to the curriculum you bought, and pouring over online resources you found on a blog post, you WILL have frustration. You will absolutely have times where you are feeling like nothing you're doing is helping and that your kid is stuck on a concept.
With that, doubt will seep in. You'll think to yourself...
Did we do enough reading today?
Are they on-level?
When is she going to stop confusing 12 with 21?
Am I teaching her to write correctly?
Did I make the right choice in homeschooling?
Fights and Burn Out
Fights. YES, there will be fights and battles of the wills. (I'm still convinced that God, knowing my stubbornness, gave me a daughter that only I could raise.) There have been times where there have been timeouts (for both of us) during a lesson, and some days where the word patience was not remotely in my repertoire of skills. There are also days when my kiddos have just NOT wanted to do school. This is normal. It happens to everyone, and it's part of the ugly.
The fights, time, and frustration can lead to burn out for both you and your kids. This is something you have to guard against as best as possible, but know that it DOES happen and when it does, you just take a break, or take the day off.
Now, if I hopefully haven't scared you off...
The Good and the Beautiful
Time with your kids
As much as I just described the time with your kids that can be nothing but an absolute nightmare, we both know it's not that way all the time, not even close. As a homeschool family, you will automatically get to see your kids AT LEAST 40 waking hours more a week, not counting the time spent away during transport to school (which in a single 36-week school year accounts for 60 days.)
In that time, your relationship with your kids will grow and deepen. You'll be able to learn so much about each other both when you're doing school and during the day that you're with them. Not to mention the sibling bond of your kids gets extremely strong! They are allowed to spend all day together instead of separated out in different classrooms.
Speaking of time, our instructional time each day is typically only 2 hours on the high end (this was for a 1st grader last year and included her independent reading time). When our planned learning for the day is done, my kids are free to play, do organized activities they are interested in, or we go to museums, the zoo, etc. I love how homeschooling really opens up the entire world to learning.
Choice of what you're Learning and Freedom
Although the choice of curriculum can seem a bit daunting in the beginning, the fact remains that you get to CHOOSE what your kids learn, and you get to know exactly what they are learning. For those wishing to, there are textbooks that seamlessly incorporate religion into core subjects, so religion is cross-curricular and not separated out.
There are also the options to buy curriculum that will give you scripts and walk you through lessons step by step (if you are a beginner, this might feel safer for the moment). Similarly, there are programs which give you basic ideas and you are free to fill in as you see fit.
Another great point is that learning is EASILY student-led. At any given time, if Charlotte or Thompson expresses an interest in a subject area or topic, I simply check our local library's catalog and check out multiple, multiple books on the topic and we deepen our understanding together. I absolutely LOVE this part of homeschooling, because it allows my kids to learn to love learning and to learn the skill of how to pursue their own interests and be lifelong learners. Learning in a homeschool setting feels completely authentic.
One-on-One Instruction
One of the aspects that truly makes homeschooling so effective, from an academic standpoint, is the power of prolonged one-on-one instruction. When your child is in a traditional class, the teacher must divide her time up among 25-30 students at a time. This impacts everything from writing, reading, math, and just general questions that kids have throughout the day. In a typical classroom setting, in first grade, a child may get roughly 10 minutes of one-on-one instruction a day (this is if the teacher is exceptionally good).
Even when I'm teaching both Charlotte and Thompson at the same time, they get almost exclusive one-on-one instruction and immediate feedback on their progress. This means that even if you are not a professionally trained teacher, your ability to teach your child effectively (and well) is easily achievable, because you are working with them in such an intense setting.
Safety
As a mom, there are plenty of worries that go around in my head about my kids on a daily basis, but when we are homeschooling, I never have to worry about their physical, mental, or emotional safety. I don't have to worry about bullies, dangers in schools, or anything else negative that could happen to them in a typical classroom setting. They are safe at home with us during their most formative years, and we get to just enjoy them.But Piper, what about socialization?
This is the question that I get asked the absolute most, and to be honest it's one I used to worry about before we made the plunge. My favorite quote to ease concerns of any people on the edge of jumping in to homeschooling is...
Yes, in the traditional school setting, my kids would be in a classroom with kids their own age. Yes, they would have recess, lunch, and PE with these kids accounting for maybe an hour or so of talking with their peers freely, but a majority of their time, they will be at their seats, listening to others speak, or talking only under certain circumstances."Forced association is not socialization."
My kids don't have those rules. They are allowed to talk all the time. We go to the store and they talk to everyone they see. We go to the playground and they are typically the first to approach other kids and make friends.
Homeschooling today is not like homeschooling on a prairie homestead. We are members of a local co-op which organizes playdates and there are TONS of co-op groups and informational groups on Facebook for homeschoolers to join. My kids also are signed up for extra-curricular activities including gymnastics, dance, and sports, and we take full advantage of story hours and other fun freebies around town.
But, Piper, what if I'm not cut out for this?
When people ask me this question, I simply tell them that if God is calling you to do this, He will help you find a way.
After all, He picked Moses, a lowly slave, to free the Jewish people from the Pharaoh in Egypt.
He also picked Saul, a cruel and hateful man, baptized him to be Paul, and he went on to write multiple books in the New Testament.
You may be completely inexperienced at teaching, and you may have even been bad at school yourself, but you are your children's parent, no one will ever be as invested in their learning and in their future as you will be. You've literally got blood in this game, and you CAN do it.
So there you have it, homeschooling, the good, the bad, the ugly, and the beautiful. Whatever you decide this coming school year, I hope this was helpful in shedding light on a very realistic option for your children.
If you want to know more or have further questions about homeschooling, feel free to message me or write in the comments below!
Happy teaching!
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